Friday, May 6, 2011

Throwing Food...

Tonight Zarah (our oldest, almost 5) and I were making pizza for dinner, so of course I had to show the girls how "professionals" do it (actually, the term I used was "real people"... then I realized that we ARE real people.) and toss the dough in the air. They all got a kick out of that, so I kept on tossing it around making them all giggle. A few minutes later as I was putting the toppings on, all of a sudden Evi (our youngest, for now... hopefully more to come :) ) started randomly tossing broccoli and laughing. "Evi!" I exclaimed in surprise, "you don't throw food"... I was shaking my head and thinking to myself, "She does the most bizarre things..." when it struck me. Duh. I was throwing food just moments before. In her mind, her tossing broccoli around made just as much sense as me tossing pizza dough around (don't worry, the dough never touched the ground. ;) ) Sometimes I feel sorry for kids... adults can be so confusing.
Does she look like she could EVER be naughty?? ;)

I don't look at my kids through rose-colored glasses or anything (ok... maybe just ever-so-slightly, pinkish-tinted...) but I find that so many times when I could have jumped on them for being "naughty", after a moment's investigation, taking the time to ask a few questions, probe into their little minds a bit, I find that they weren't being naughty at all. I'm not afraid to call sin sin, and I definitely don't want my girls getting away with naughtiness and turning into unlikable brats, but I also want to remember that they've been alive for just a few short years. We adults sort of expect them to have everything figured out like we do (I wish I really did!), but that takes time! And experience! And training... and that's where we come in. I suppose I could have slapped Evi's hand and snapped at her, "We do NOT throw food!" and gone on my merry way, thinking I was being a good mom because I disciplined my kid, and because I don't let my kids get away with anything. Meanwhile, some little heartstrings that attached Evi's heart to mine would have gone "snap" and Evi would have been left confused and hurt and a little guarded around her Mama, and absolutely none-the-wiser concerning proper or improper food-throwing. It makes me feel sick just imagining that.

I'm not saying that you just let your kids do whatever they want and never tell them "no" or discipline them. I just think we need to do a LOT more teaching and explaining. Obviously, Evi needed to learn that there's a difference between throwing pizza dough and throwing broccoli. But that's my point. She needed to LEARN that... so I taught her. And we had a good laugh and we BOTH went merrily on our way, our hearts knit a little closer together.

P.S. If you've been looking at your children through glasses that say "BRAT" across the lens, you just might try swapping them out for some ever-so-slightly pinkish-tinted ones. You might be surprised to find out that you're kid's not so much a brat, as just a little child that needs taught what's acceptable and what's not.


  1. SO very true. Thank you for sharing! It's a great reminder and I hope that I am as a good a mom someday as you are!! :)

  2. Sarah, thank you!! :) I can't tell you how exciting it was to get my first comment! ;) Trust me... there are days when I feel like the biggest failure as a mother. Come stay with me for awhile and you'll have no doubt that you'll be at least as good a mom as I am. ;) You seem to be a very well-loved Aunt, and hopefully it won't be long till you get to try your hand at the whole mommy thing. ;)

  3. I, too, am always trying to think about the motivation behind the little things my boys do. I find it makes everything more interesting, and makes them so much more understandable.
    I like the P.S. about brat glasses. :)


"Leave a comment" sounds so pushy and demanding. Exactly. Leave a comment.